Thomas Dowd
  • Facebook
  • Linkedin
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • RSS
  • Home
  • My Programs
    • Speaking Programs
    • Program Details
  • Products
  • Your Training Answers
  • Meet Tom
  • Testimonials
    • Testimonials
    • Book Reviews & Praise
  • Blog & Events
  • Media Room
  • Contact
Search the site...

Confessions of a Loser

July 26, 2013 / tomdowd / News
0

In 2009, I wrote a speech for Project Six in the Toastmasters’ Competent Communicator manual.  I was more than halfway to my competent communicator goal of ten speeches and was very proud of my progress.  A fellow club member said that I should enter the upcoming international speech competition.  My response was, “What competition?”  I had no idea there were speech contests.   I am a competitive person by nature, so I entered.  Being introverted like so many people within the Toastmasters organization, I could see the value of being thrust in front of a bunch of people I didn’t know to share a story that I had only shared in front of my club—I think.  Being a consummate learner, I knew my learning curve would grow exponentially with the added pressure.

I need to set the tone that I had just learned to let go of the lectern with clenched fingers and was only starting to understand that I didn’t have to stand behind it.  I was also still weaning off my addiction of looking at notes.  The contest day came quickly.  I stood in the middle of the floor at my very first contest.  I looked good—for a stiff, upright, tensed shoulders-looking speaker afraid of moving from one spot.  Apparently, I owned that space on the floor and feared someone would steal it if I moved—so there I remained for my six and a half minutes.  The verdict was announced.  I didn’t win.  However, I finished second in our club and would move on to the next level—the area contest.

I was given feedback going into the area-level contest that I could actually move—if I wanted.  Being a literal guy, I let it all loose at the area contest.  I think I scared the audience, or at least distracted them a little, as I quickly scurried back and forth across the stage with no thought of anchoring my story, let alone stopping long enough to have the audience absorb the poignant points that must have sounded like a training whistle speeding by.  I didn’t win.  Yet, my content must have been strong enough to get some of the judges’ attention since I received the second place nod to move on to the division level.  I had yet to win a contest, but was finding some success, was having fun, and was gaining confidence.  At the divisional level, I was blown away by the other competitors’ speeches.  I didn’t even close to placing.  To make excuses, I didn’t write my speech as an “international” contest speech entry since I didn’t even know what one was. I did learn more about how contests work and found out that I had grown.  Additionally, I learned a valuable lesson of looking at the speech ballot so I would know how I was being judged going forward.

I was feeling good enough to try the next humorous speech contest.  I was fortunate enough to move on to the division finals—again, I finished in second place.  I still had yet to win a contest, but second place continued to be good enough to advance.  As I stood in front of about fifty people, the first line became locked in my head and I didn’t have the key.  My brain refused to release my thoughts to my mouth while the second line was bursting to come out.  There I stood in silence wondering what to do next.  After what seemed like an hour, I chose to skip the first line and just started on the second.  I finished in third place.  I had learned another lesson.  I realized my preparation technique of standing in front of a mirror or talking to my steering wheel in my car while I drove wouldn’t cut it if I wanted to succeed in speech competitions. I significantly revamped my preparation by finding live practice audiences beyond waiting for Toastmaster meetings.

The following year, I made it to the District 45 finals of the international speech contest.  One of the competitors jokingly told me before the contest, “I hope I win the world championship so I can quit my day job.”  I said, “What’s the world championship?”  I had no idea the winner would advance to the world semi-finals.  My confidence took a little hit when I found that a few competitors were professional speakers.  Additionally, during lunch one of the organizers announced that two-thirds of the conference attendees were from Canada.  As a U.S. member who had written a speech with U.S. statistics, I panicked and modified my speech two hours before the competition.  I stumbled on a line mid-way through my presentation later that night.  I didn’t place in the top three.  I learned another lesson.  Know your audience better.  More importantly, I learned the value of having mentors.  The contest winner provided me support, encouragement, and feedback after the contest.  He became a mentor and a long-time friend.

Fall rolled around again and it was time for a new humorous speech. In the middle of my contest speech at the division level, a jackhammer was hard at work in the background.  I was so distracted that I lost my place.  Although I had made some changes to my practice preparation, I would typically search for complete silence so I wouldn’t be distracted.  Yes, I lost again—I didn’t even place in the top three.  Lesson learned! I started searching for distractions, whether it was my daughter playing the piano or turning on the television or radio.

The competitions continued.  During the international speech competition at the district level again, I had a picture of the main subject that I flipped around for the audience to see in the middle of my speech.  After losing again, I was given feedback that the props weren’t needed for this speech since I had already painted the picture for the audience with the descriptive words I was using.  The blank sign was also seen as creating too many questions in the mind of the audience until it was shown while making my stage movement predictable.  I was learning lessons about the appropriate use of props.

I am a loser—and I wouldn’t want it any other way.  There can be only one winner who gets a trophy, but I can’t count the number of wins I’ve had while competing without receiving the hardware.   These losses led me down the path of in-depth concentration on understanding audiences, learning to play to my strengths, and setting my goals higher.  More importantly, I realized who I am and who I want to be as a speaker. During this time, I’ve continued to participate in contests, including having the fortune to win the District 45 Table Topics Championship in both 2012 and 2013.  The desire to better myself led me to write two books on personal growth which include many of these same lessons.  I’ve also started my own business.  I blame Toastmasters for much of this.  I tell you this not to be boastful, but because I am a loser.  I am better because I joined Toastmasters.  The Toastmasters program has given me confidence to try things I never thought I would while showing me the importance of the journey, not the end result.  I am better today than yesterday, but not yet as good as tomorrow—and that’s okay.  Every loss turned into a win when I found nuggets of information that could make me a better speaker—and person.  The contests are just a microcosmic look at what has driven me to become who I wanted to be.  The contests, for me, became a spring board to look at my life as a whole and became a driving factor to make many other decisions to personally and professionally transform me.  Each loss catapulted me toward another challenge and more success.  Have you lost, yet really won lately?  You too can become a loser!

Thomas B. Dowd III’s books The Transformation of a Doubting Thomas: Growing from a Cynic to a Professional in the Corporate World (Honorable Mention at the 2012 New England Book Festival) and From Fear to Success: A Practical Public-speaking Guide (2013 Axiom Business Book Awards Gold Medal Winner and 2013 Paris Book Festival Honorable Mention) are available under “Products” on www.transformationtom.com. Book and eBook purchase options are also available on Amazon- Please click the link to be re-directed: Amazon.com

Dowd, leadership, learning, lose, loser, losers, speaking, speech competitions, Thomas Dowd, toastmaster, Toastmasters, Tom Dowd, transformation, transformation tom, win, winning

Guest Blog Post by Professional Inspirational Speaker and Trainer Steve Gamlin: “Are You Clearing Hay Fields with a Weed-Wacker?”

January 9, 2013 / tomdowd / Leadership, News
2

This past Summer, just after my fiancée moved back to New Hampshire, I faced a dilemma. The back lawn at Tina’s house hadn’t been mowed in quite some time, and the neighbor’s plants had decided the grass was greener in her yard. The root system of the vines next door had invaded…with a vengeance (or is that a vine-geance?).

The Jurassic lawnmower in the shed had last been started during Clinton’s first term. It took just 2 pulls before the cord frayed and snapped, leaving me on my butt with the handle and 6 inches of rope still in my grip.

I instantly pronounced Tyrannosaurus Rust officially ‘extinct’.

Steve Gamlin blog picture

Dejected, I trudged to the car for my 100-foot extension cord so I could power up the electric weed-wacker. Needle in a haystack? That was me, as I was essentially trimming a hayfield one flailing swipe at a time.

After completing about 1/3 of the back yard in an hour (and dripping with sweat) Tina and I (mostly me) made a decision: it was time to invest in a new lawnmower!

A quick trip to the hardware store (with a cool coupon, Tina’s a smart shopper) meant a ride home with an extra passenger: a bright and shiny new Husqvarna self-propelled mower. After minimal assembly, and a check of this unfamiliar yard for rocks and branches, I was off!

It took less than 15 minutes to finish the job, completely and effectively.

Ever feel you’re trying to do YOUR job with inefficient tools?

Is your support team suffering a similar fate?

Are you lost in a huge ‘business’ hayfield armed only with a weed-wacker?

Perhaps this week you can invest in yourself, and your tool arsenal, becoming more efficient and empowered.

Could your technology use some updating?  Has a new book or audio product been created just for your industry?

Is there a conference which could serve to inspire and educate your team members to play at the top of their game?

Please do not continue weed-wacking in the endless hay-field of Big Business and the Web!

Here’s to YOU, my friends: may you honor your mission by arming yourself with more effective tools.

The most powerful one is your mind. That’s a good place to start.

Fire it up and clear out everything that’s in your way, powerfully and efficiently!

 

Steve desribes himself as,”I am a regular guy from a blue-collar background who followed his dreams, survived the speedbumps and a few rollovers.”  Steve is a professional speaker, entertainer and author,with a goal to become the most AUTHENTIC movtivational voice which has ever graced a stage.  As a fellow member of Toastmasters and the National Speakers Association, I can say that Steve’s voice is not only authentic, it is being heard by many audiences.  I applaud Steve’s success and wish to share his AUTHENTICITY with my own audience.  Thanks for your contribution Steve! Please feel free to share and add your comments.

 

Steve Gamlin’s contact information:

P.O. Box 5

Goffstown, NH 03045

(603) 560-3360

Steve@SteveGamlin.com

www.SteveGamlin.com

 

guest blog, leadership, national speakers association, speaker, Toastmasters, Tom Dowd, training, transformation

Post from Transformation Tom- Rising Above Perceptions by Bob Ferland

September 28, 2012 / tomdowd / News
2

The following is an inspirational Toastmasters speech written by Bob Ferland, who has learned to rise above any challange thrown his way….

Rising Above Perceptions

How do we define ourselves and others? How do we rationalize what is truly important?

Do we define ourselves by our appearance or looks?

How about physical strength, abilities, intelligence, or intellect?

What about material wealth?

All of the following factors play some role in who we are individually; as well as how we view others.  It is up to us to personally prioritize what is truly important.

Let us begin by looking at first impressions.  Based on how we feel when we first see somebody, we may unintentionally evaluate by appearance, or even by socioeconomic status, considering how neat or clean a person appears, as well as the condition or style of attire they are wearing.  Whether we like to admit it or not, we are all prone to treating somebody who appears to be better off with a higher level of respect compared to somebody who does not appear to be as well off.

How about other factors, such as physical strength and abilities? How often do we inadvertently treat somebody better who is in shape, compared to somebody else who does not appear to be as physically fit.

We are all guilty of having preconceived ideas about people within certain areas, based on our own perception of normality.

What do you think about when you think about me?

Growing up with a disability, I’ve dealt with a number of perceptions.  Let me help you rise above your perceptions.

No matter how hard I tried to walk normally, or play along as a youth with others, I had the perpetual feeling that no matter how hard I tried, I would never be able to participate or even compete at the same level as others without adversity.  Negative thoughts that others potentially had about me was also a concern.

It is challenging to deal with things beyond your control.

However; allowing personal trials to govern your life, inhibiting you from reaching your full potential is NOT an option!

Since the age of five, I had a physical therapist who pushed me very hard.  I learned how to set goals at a tender, young age.  Each session consisted of muscle stretching and strengthening, as major leg muscles were spastic or perpetually tight.

Following the stretching, we would work on functional exercises; which would be little to no effort for a normal person, but was consistently an intense workout for me.  These exercises involved standing out of a chair or attempting to walk within a straight line.

What made each of these exercises exceptionally challenging, was the fact that after my spastic muscles were stretched, I no longer had the strength, previously depended upon.  I needed to supplement with my opposing non-spastic muscles, which are very weak, seeing the non-spastic muscles do not have an opportunity to work, consistently being overpowered by my spastic muscles.

From late grammar school through high school, my physical therapist had me work on running laps within the gymnasium.  This was challenging enough with a balance problem.  After each therapy session, having my leg muscles aggressively stretched, no longer able to utilize spasticity, I had no choice but to supplement with my weaker non-spastic muscles.

Each therapy session happened on a weekly basis.  I would also train in the gym, nearly every day, prior to school, pushing myself to go further and further.

Initially when I first started, I was barely able to successfully complete half a lap around the gym, prior to feeling completely winded and no longer able to continue.

By the end of the school year, I was able to accomplish 10 laps around the entire gymnasium, even after feeling the effects of a cumulative therapy session.

Growing up and even now, I work so much harder than just about anybody else to simply get around.

In addition to physical therapy for my legs, I spent time in high school, college, and even today working out at various gyms on my upper and lower body.

Considering my past, I thrive on aggressive personal goals.  My workouts begin with strength training, where I need to achieve 12 repetitions, twice in order to achieve goal at moderate weights.

The end of each workout is dedicated to cardio, spending “quality time” on the Elliptical.  This simulates a natural running pattern that I am unable to acquire on my own.  When I first started on the Elliptical, I used a consistently low ramp level with no resistance.  My standard cardio goal was a full mile within 20 minutes.  As time progressed, I steadily increased the ramp level and now run on Interval, where the ramp level and resistance changes every two minutes from ramp level four with no resistance to ramp level 10 with resistance level 8.  Yes, I am tired after each workout! 

No matter how challenging life becomes, I have learned to rise above, remaining focused on maintaining a positive attitude, even within challenging circumstances.

 Life gives us two options.

 One option is to accept defeat by quitting early.

 The second option is to persevere and push through, no matter how challenging the situation appears.

 The only limits that truly exist are the limits we establish for ourselves.

 To summarize this speech, we all perceive things differently upon looking at ourselves and others.  We may even think we are better off than somebody else, based on our own abilities or qualities we possess.  I simply ask that we all look beyond what is seen on the outside and attempt to look at the heart of each person on the inside, determining what truly drives and motivates each of us to accomplish our daily and lifelong goals.

Thank you!

– Bob Ferland

 

Thomas B. Dowd III books The Transformation of a Doubting Thomas: Growing from a Cynic to a Professional in the Corporate World and From Fear to Success: A Practical Public-speaking Guide are available under “Products” on www.transformationtom.com.  Book and eBook purchase options are also available on Amazon- Please click the link to be re-directed:  Amazon.com

 

advice, anxiety, author, book, business, business development, Business Training, change, Coach, coaching, communication, Communications, Confidence, control, development, differentiate, differentiation, diverse, diversity, Dowd, fear, growth, impatience, impatient, inclusion, Inspiration, leadership, Management, Marketing, mental, model, Motivation, Networking, patience, perceptions, Personal, personal growth, practice, preparation, prepare, professional advice, Professional Development, prove, public-speaking, Résumé, Résumé Writing, right, role, role model, speaker, speaking, speech, success, Thomas, Thomas Dowd, Toastmasters, tom, Tom Dowd, training, transformation, transformation tom, transformationtom, visualize success

Post from Transformation Tom: Call it Irony (article appeared in District 45 Toastmasters Newsletter)

September 21, 2012 / tomdowd / News
0

Call it Irony

           I was full of pride when Donna Tutty sent me a note about an opportunity to present to the Maine Waste Water Control Association (MWWCA) at Sugarloaf Resort on September 13, 2012.  The group was described as very technical and trade-oriented, and they were looking for something a little out of the ordinary.  The audience was used to job-specific presentations, and the organizers were looking to add something fresh to the curriculum when they asked District 45 to send a representative to discuss public speaking.

As Toastmasters, we have been taught to prepare our presentations so that we know the material inside and out.  In fact, part of my presentation “From Fear to Success” was geared around practice and preparation in order to reduce anxiety.  I had no idea how much the training would come in handy.

I got a good night’s sleep, went for an early run while the sun was rising, and felt great about representing our district.  I went to the event two hours early to meet the organizers and to network with the organization.  I was instantly greeted by several people who made me feel welcome.  Today was going to be a good day.

In my preparation a few weeks before the event, I had asked the organizers about microphones, but they said they weren’t needed.  I went to the room where I would be presenting to practice my speech and to get a feel of the acoustics and the stage.  Let’s start with the sound.  I instantly found some echoing in the open room chamber that also had a wide-open staircase and vendors on the floor below causing a significant amount of white noise.  I knew I had to adapt my voice since there were no doors to close.

I still had some concerns with the room set-up.  Part of my list of questions for the organizers weeks prior to the event included whether or not there was a lectern.  The organizer said there would be one in the room, yet when I showed up, it wasn’t to be found. There was no need to panic, because I still had ninety minutes before my presentation.  I found someone on the facility staff who said he would take care of me.  He found a half lectern that could go on top of a huge table that would have been right in the middle of my anticipated stage.  As an alternative, he found a shelf used for ski boot storage that he could rig up.  The set-up had the lectern at chin height. While my facility friend was being creative, I found a different set of workers and I asked if they had any other ideas.  Within minutes a lectern was rolled my way.

Unfortunately, my lectern dilemma was just the beginning of a good day that could easily slip away into panic and stress as I tried to resolve my issues.  There were to be dual presenters before me who were sitting behind laptops at a large table that needed to be moved prior to my speech.  The table was easy to move but the multiple cords and projector that sat right in the center of my supposed stage was not only tripping hazards, they were in my intended speaking path.  It didn’t help that the screen for my slides was tucked awkwardly into a corner.  When I moved the projector out of my walking path, the projected slides were keystone in shape and too small for the audience to see.  As the moderator and I attempted to resolve the slides, we found that the auto adjustments on the projector itself weren’t working properly. We attempted to resolve the problem by tucking pads of paper under one side of the projector.  We were right up against the time for the first presenters, so we needed a break for about an hour.  This left me with thirty minutes to resolve the issue prior to my presentation.  Was I nervous?  No, because I had a Plan B.

When I had the chance, I hooked up my own projector and we were back in business.  Unfortunately, the moderator’s laptop was now having problems.  Time for Plan C.  I connected my own laptop and we were once again back in business.  As for speaker introductions, many of us have learned to not only write our own, but to share it with the moderator to ensure he or she meets the presenter’s expectations.  She said she liked my introduction.  However, she planned to cut it short and adlib to allow more speaking time.  I told her how diligent Toastmasters attempt to be with timing, and that I had actually accounted for her to read to entire introduction.  She reluctantly agreed, until she went to grab her copy and couldn’t find it.  I reached into my folder and handed her the extra copy I had for “just in case” situations.  This allowed me the time to share how I preferred to have my introduction delivered.  She seemed relieved and appreciative.

The actual presentation could not have gone any better. The audience was receptive and the Toastmasters’ training proved its value easily.  I know a few years ago how panic-stricken I would have been and how the road blocks could have held me back from getting the message I wanted to the audience.  Instead, I was able to be flexible, offer solutions to the problems, and even incorporate the problems into the presentation to enhance it.  As for the moderator’s concern about going over our allotted time, for my hour-long presentation, I finished in 59 minutes and thirty seconds.  Thank you Toastmasters’ training.

A presentation about practice and preparation to reduce anxiety and lead to success was put into action before it even started—call it irony.  As a Toastmaster you have significant control over your own successes.  Be ready for the unexpected and don’t be surprised when the unexpected appears.  Be confident in everything you have learned, or will learn, from Toastmasters’ training. Your communication and leadership skills will ensure that any moment of fear can turn into success.

 

Thomas B. Dowd III books The Transformation of a Doubting Thomas: Growing from a Cynic to a Professional in the Corporate World and From Fear to Success: A Practical Public-speaking Guide are available under “Products” on www.transformationtom.com.  Book and eBook purchase options are also available on Amazon- Please click the links to be re-directed:  Amazon.com

advice, anxiety, author, book, business, business development, Business Training, change, Coach, coaching, communication, Communications, Confidence, control, development, Dowd, fear, gestures, growth, Inspiration, irony, leadership, Management, Marketing, mental, Motivation, Networking, Personal, personal growth, physical, practice, preparation, prepare, professional advice, Professional Development, public-speaking, relax, Résumé, Résumé Writing, speaker, speaking, strength, success, tense, tension, Thomas, Thomas Dowd, Toastmasters, tom, Tom Dowd, training, transformation, transformation tom, transformationtom, visualize success

Subscribe

Connect with me on Facebook Connect with me on LinkedIn Watch me on YouTube Subscribe to my Blog Feed! Follow

Join My Mailing List

    First Name

    Last Name

    Your Email (required)

    (c) 2020. All rights reserved. Web Design by Jason Bobich